One of the Best Days of My Life! by Gabby Jones

One of the best days of my life was when I got my first dog. It's been a little more than a year since I brought her home, just a few weeks ago we celebrated our one year anniversary!

She is a Golden Retriever. Her name is Marley. I named her after the book/movie Marley and Me.

Her litter was the first litter, which is something you should look for when adopting a dog because the newer the litter the healthier the mom will be, and if the mom dog is healthy so will the litter.

I have six siblings, three brothers and three sisters, but my parents only took me and my little brother (we’re the two youngest.) At that time I was twelve and my brother, Ethan, was nine. It was a Saturday and we had new neighbors moving in a couple houses up the street so my mom, my sister and I, baked cookies for them. Then, my brother and I walked up to their house and gave them the cookies to kind of say “Welcome to the neighborhood!” When we got home my parents were leaving. They said they were going to look at a farm for sale.

We live in a small neighborhood near a little park and my parents have always wanted to move to the sticks and have a lot of land, so did the rest of my family.  It was a normal thing to hear my parents say “Let’s go look at a farm!” It was pretty exciting though. A few minutes later my parents came back and asked if my little brother and I wanted to go with them. At that moment I knew something was up.We started our journey to Rebersburg, PA. When we were about twenty minutes from there, my mom got a call from her friend Lee.

Lee is kind of like a construction worker. My parents buy and flip houses and they usually needed him for stuff so he worked for them a lot and just like that became friends.

When we first met him he was at our house and told us he had a dog, so we said aww that's cute but then he hit us with saying she was in his truck! Lee was a big tough guy, so we expected him to have a big scary looking dog. To our surprise he had a golden retriever! She was about a year old. Her name was Sadie. From that point on we’ve always watched Sadie when he went to work. He would drop her off in the morning and pick her up around the time school ends. Anyway, she was on the phone with him but my brother and I didnt know that. All we knew was that it was someone talking about something important because she said “The kids are here so you know.”

When we got there I was confused because there was no for sale sign and the place was a mess. There were broken windows, stuff all over the place, and lots of farming equipment. There were two teenage Amish boys that came out to see us and little Amish girls also running around. The older one started to whistle and say “come here!” A few seconds later two ten week old Golden Retriever puppies came bustling out of a little garage. We got to hold them, play with them, and pet them. There was a boy named Lucky and a girl named Lavender.

A few minutes later they brought the mom dog out. She was only one and a half years old! She was very sweet and playful (Marley definitely got that from her mom). The puppies were the last two out of thirteen, but only seven survived in the litter.

We picked Lavender (and named her Marley). She was number six to be adopted which is a coincidence because I was one of seven, and the sixth kid to be born! So it was fate from there.

Opinion: LGBTQ+ View by Linden Dolezal

Many people in our school are part of the LGBTQ+ community. I know this for a fact. I would just like to explain why I think it is a wonderful thing.  LGBTQ+ stands for lesbian (which describes a girl who only likes other girls), gay (which describes a boy who only likes other boys), bisexual (which describes someone who is only attracted to boys and girls), transgender or trans for short (which describes when someone who is a biological boy or girl feels/knows that they are a different gender), and queer (which describes anyone who is attracted to people of the same gender). 

There are many more terms, like aroace (which is someone who feels no romantic attraction to anyone), pansexual (which is someone who is attracted to people of all genders); the list goes on and on. I firmly believe that people who describe themselves as one or more of these are perfectly normal and should be treated as such. It is not weird to be a girl and love girls or to be born a boy but feel like a girl, in fact, it is incredible that people can discover these things about themselves. I don’t think gay marriage should be illegal anywhere, or that people who haven’t come out (a term that means telling someone that you are trans, gay, lesbian, etc) to their friends and family might be too afraid to because of their families' beliefs. Everyone should be supported for who they are, and no one has any right to tell them otherwise. 

I am part of the community myself and have had a few people say that it is wrong. However, I have some advice for everyone who has non-supportive friends or family: surround yourself with people who support you, people who care, and people who don't make fun of you or tell you that your sexuality or gender is wrong. And to all of the LGBTQ+ people reading this, keep being you!

Dogs vs. Cats by Cam Byron and Sam Pelletier

Cats:

Pros: Tiny, Agile, Soft, Cuddly, Warm, Cute, Adorable

Cons: Mean (Some), Independent (Some), Sharp claws.

Dogs:

Pros: Bigger, some are cuddly, adorable, energetic(some) Loyal, Playful, Affectionate, Intelligent, Trainable

Cons: Shedding issues, Mean (Some), separation anxiety(some), sometimes can chew things.

Overall, cats and dogs are good options for people getting their first pets. Both animals can have great personalities, but some of them can still be “mean”. Here are some of the opinions of Cameron and Sam, two Park Forest students. First, Cameron.  “I think that dogs are better than cats.” Second, Sam thinks as well that dogs are better than cats. 

Cameron’s justification: Dogs are better than cats because I have had a dog my whole life. I believe that dogs are better than cats, because they have a better personality and I think that they are just more cuddly and more cute overall. I also believe that dogs are more intelligent and more fun to play with. With this information in mind, I can gladly say, “Dogs are better than cats”. 

Sam’s justification: Dogs are better than cats, because I also have had a dog my whole life and at one point had a cat as well and due to this experience, I can say that dogs are better. First of all, dogs won't scratch up your furniture. Second,  they give you more exercise because they need more walking. Lastly, dogs are overall cuter and cuddlier than cats. 

Image Source; Canva

Who is Big Kev? By Sean Fulmer, Felix Sawers and Jack Dillon

 “Who is Big Kev?” asked Big Zane.

To find out the true origins of Big Kev, a mouse that runs around Park Forest Middle School, we must first interview one of Big Kev’s closest friends, computer depot assistant Mr. Walnut.

“He was a surprise from day one,” confessed Mr. Walnut.  “He really loved Madden ‘06, and he also beat every level of Monkey.”

In addition, Mr. Walnut admitted that ,“Big Kev’s favorite snack is intense nacho takis.”

Sadly Big Kev’s journey came to an end PROBABLY, as he has disappeared from the depot and hasn’t been seen recently.

RIP Big Kev. Probably.

Did You Know You're Eating Poison? By Tara Gopalan

When you think of poison, you may imagine bubbling green tubes of liquid, or a small vial with radioactive-looking powder in it. Sadly, poison isn't that easy to identify: Nature is its own form of mad chemist. Don’t worry! everything in this article is only deadly in giant portions. Common foods that we eat every day have deadly poison in them, and I’m here to tell you which ones! 

Cyanide - Cherry pits, apple seeds, and almonds all have small concentrations of cyanide in them! Eating too many could cause sickness and drowsiness, but it would be difficult to eat a deadly amount: that would be pounds! 

Lectin - Raw elderberries, elderberry leaves, kidney beans, soybeans, castor beans, and even wheat all have high concentrations of Lectin. Unlike Cyanide, Lectin often causes abdominal pain and vomiting when consumed, regardless of how much you eat. However, you don’t get sick from eating these foods because cooking them removes a lot of Lectin. Be careful!

Myristicin - Nutmeg, Star Anise, cinnamon, parsley, and black pepper all have an oil called Myristicin. Even just 2 teaspoons of some spices can cause dizziness, confusion, hallucinations, and sometimes even seizures. 

Glycoalkaloid (gl-eye-coal-cal-oid) - Raw green potatoes, potato shoots, eggplant, and raw tomatoes all have a toxic substance called glycoalkaloid. This is on the more dangerous side, because it is present in nightshade veggies. This toxin can easily cause nausea, confusion, and sometimes death if eaten in high concentrations. 

Oxalic acid - Rhubarb, spinach, kale, chard, sweet potatoes, and beets all contain small concentrations of Oxalic acid. This chemical bonds to the Calcium in your body and makes it harder to absorb. If too much is eaten raw over a long period of time, it stunts bone growth and puts you at risk for blood clotting, kidney stones, and vomiting. 

Urushiol - This is the same poison that’s found in poison ivy. Raw Cashews and Mangoes both contain this toxin, and if you’re someone who’s allergic to poison ivy, then eating either could cause breathing problems and rashes.

Are you thoroughly terrified yet? Good. I hope you learned the important lesson that everything can be dangerous if you try to make it! In all seriousness, these are only dangerous in large quantities. No matter what, seeing the dangers of common foods can help us see the thin line between food and poison! Next time you’re forced to eat something you don’t like, just pull out the facts and say, “I won’t eat poison!”

Work Cited

Ellis, Rachel Reiff. “Common Foods That Can Be Toxic.” WebMD, https://www.webmd.com/food-recipes/ss/slideshow-toxic-foods. Accessed 8 November 2024.

Is Thanksgiving Really a Holiday? By Olive Hollis

A holiday according to the Oxford dictionary is a “day of festivities, in which no work is done” but is Thanksgiving really all that festive? Yeah, most people who celebrate go to be with family or have family come over to eat a bunch of food and see each other. But we all know what really happens on Thanksgiving and how it really is not a day for us to celebrate seeing as the Americans who came over weren’t the nicest to the people that they encountered in America…

But anyway, you could eat food with your family and friends on any weekend that lines up with everyone's schedules. But you know who made Thanksgiving a holiday? Abraham Lincoln!! 

I have to admit Lincoln did make some pretty great decisions, but nonetheless, he made Thanksgiving a holiday, which meant people went hundreds of years without Thanksgiving, so I propose that we rename the day National Turkey Day! See? You can keep the whole turkey thing but it’s just not a holiday. 

Anyway, getting back to the meaning of a holiday, it says that it’s a day of festivities and no work. Most of the time you don’t have to go to work or school on Thanksgiving, so I guess that part of the definition is true, but is Thanksgiving actually all that festive? Yeah sure you eat food with loved ones and you might put on some football game here and there. Now I’m not saying that Thanksgiving isn’t festive or worthy of being a holiday. I’m saying that in my opinion Thanksgiving just doesn’t quite seem like a true holiday.

And do you see a bunch of turkey blow up in your yard? No. Do you see a bunch of Thanksgiving decorations other than sparkly leaves in bright colors? Not really, no. And what else is associated with Thanksgiving other than eating, meeting up with family, and football? Not much!

Top Ten Animal Lists by Penny Baxter

Dogs are famously the #1 favorite animal, but what about animals in different categories? Like, what are the scariest animals, or the cutest animals? We will have 10 top ten animal lists from various sources, so if you look it up and you get a different animal, that’s someone else’s opinion, or a different source. All sources will be listed at the end. 

List # 1: Top Ten Pets from PetHelpful

Let’s start with some pet facts. 86.9 million homes in the U.S. own a pet. For context, that is 66% of the homes in the U.S.  Americans love furry friends so much, they spent $136.8 billion on them in 2021. And if you want a dog, know that it annually costs an average of $1,533. 

Number 10: Ferrets

Number 9: Poultry

Number 8: Saltwater Fish

Number 7: Horses 

Number 6: Reptiles  

Number 5: Birds

Number 4: Small Animals

Number 3: Freshwater Fish

Number 2: Cats

And number 1: Dogs! Dogs are the most favorite pet!

 List # 2: Top Ten Arthropods 

Arthropods are basically anything that people call a bug. The list comes from ThoughtCo. 

Disclaimer: if you are an arachnophobe, I highly recommend not looking up images. 

Number 10: Horseshoe Crab 

Number 9: Jumping Spider

Number 8: Lesser Marbled Fritillary

Number 7: Ghost Crab

Number 6: Katydid

Number 5: Millipede

Number 4: Porcelain Crab

Number 3: Rosy Lobsterette

Number 2: Dragonflies

And Number 1: Ladybug! Ladybugs are the # 1 arthropod!

List # 3: Top Ten Deep Sea Creatures

Deep sea creatures. Some of the scariest animals to come across. To prepare you for this unlikely event, here are the top ten deep sea creatures. These creatures come from howstuffworks. Once again, an image warning. 

Number 10: Sea Angel

Number 9: Deep Sea Anglerfish

Number 8: Sea Pig

Number 7:  Giant Sea Spider

Number 6: Giant Isopod

Number 5: Frilled Shark

Number 4: Sea Cucumber

Number 3: Japanese Spider Crab

Number 2: Fangtooth Fish

And # 1: Pelican Eel! Pelican Eel is the # 1 Deep Sea Creature! 

List # 4: Top Ten Unloved Animals

A lot of animals get love, but what about those who don’t? 

Number 10: Dingo

Number 9: Chagos anemonefish

Number 8: Horrid ground weaver

Number 7: European pond turtle

Number 6: Pangolins

Number 5: Black legged kittiwake

Number 4: Silky shark

Number 3: Okapi

Number 2:Galapagos giant tortoise

And Number 1:Scottish wildcat! Scottish Wild is the # 1 Unloved Animal

List #5: Top Ten Rodents

Speaking of unloved, let’s move on to rodents. This one is a little different, it was difficult to find a top ten list, so this is a top 7. You choose 8, 9, 10. 

Number 7: Naked mole rat

Number 6: Mexican hairy dwarf porcupine

Number 5: Mountain Beaver

Number 4: Malayan Giant Squirrel 

Number 3: African Crested Rat

Number 2: Rakali

And Number 1: Capybara! Capybara is the # 1 Rodent!

List # 6: Top Ten Cutest Animals

Number 10: Pika

Number 9: Axolotl

Number 8: Red Panda

Number 7: Sugar Glider

Number 6: Galago

Number 5: Quokka

Number 4: Giant Panda

Number 3.:Rusty Spotted Cat

Number 2: Adélie Penguin

And # 1. Fennec Fox! Fennec Fox is the # 1 Cutest Animal!

List # 7: Top Ten Scariest Animals

We talked cute, now scary. We might also have some returning contenders. And a trigger warning. 

Number 10: African Giant Millipede

Number 9: Lion’s Mane Jellyfish

Number 8: Tarantula Hawk Moth (Trigger Warning!)

Number 7: Asian Giant Hornet (Trigger Warning!)

Number 6: Goliath Bird Eating Spider (Trigger Warning!)

Number 5: Emperor Scorpion

Number 4: Goliath Tigerfish

Number 3: Black Flying Fox

Number 2: Giant Marine Isopod

And Number 1: Japanese Spider Crab! The Japanese Spider Crab is the Scariest Animal!

List # 8: Top Ten Farm Animals

Time to head to the farm. It was hard to find a top ten, so we have a top nine.

Number 9: Pekin Duck

Number 8: Quail

Number 7: Rabbits

Number 6: Chickens

Number 5.: Goats

Number 4: Pigs

Number 3: Bees

Number 2: Cows

And Number 1: Other Poultry! Misc Poultry is the # 1 Farm Animal!

List # 9: Top Ten Extinct Animals

Lets rank some animals that didn’t live to now.

Number 10: West African Black Rhino 

Number 9: Baiji White Dolphin

Number 8: Pyrenean Ibex

Number 7: Passenger Pigeon

Number 6: Tasmanian Tiger 

Number 5: Stellers Sea Cow

Number 4: Great Auks

Number 3: Dodo

Number 2: Wooly Mammoth

And Number 1: The Saber-Toothed Tiger! The saber-toothed tiger is the # 1 Extinct Animal! 

List # 10: Top Ten Endangered Animals

Now, what are some animals that need your support right now? 

Number 10: Hawksbill Turtles

Number 9: Sumatran Orangutan 

Number 8: African Forest Elephants

Number 7: Black Rhinos

Number 6: Yangtze Finless Porpoise

Number 5: Tapanuli Orangutan

Number 4: Mountain Gorillas

Number 3: Sunda Island Tiger

Number 2: Amur Leopard

Number 1: Javen Rhinos. Javen Rhinos are the # 1 Endangered Animal!

Resources: Top Ten pets statistics from Forbes Advisor, Cover Image is from The New Yorker, Top Ten Pets list from PetHelpful, Top Ten Arthropods list from ThoughtCo., howstuffworks, MBARI, The Guardian, Cool Green Science, Earth Rangers, Farmbrite, One Kind Planet, World Wildlife Fund

Top Ten Cookie Flavors by Iris Kramkowski

Image Source: Unsplash

10# Biscotti 

If you don't know, it's usually sweet but it really depends how you make it. 

9# Macaroons 

Macaroons come in all flavors. It has a hard shell and a soft cookie and some frosting buttercream inside but you can put anything inside. 

8# Black and White 

Black and white cookies have different tastes. No it's not that they are black and white it's about the interesting flavor they have, they usually have a hint of vanilla or lemon.

7# Gingerbread Cookies

Gingerbread can have a more of a strong flavor and sometimes they may be more like a cracker. It can have something like a ginger flavor like in the name you might recognize it bye building gingerbread houses or or gingerbread men.

6# Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

They have a good texture but a little chewy sometimes but they have a buttery taste and a light wisp of cinnamon. 

5# White Chocolate Chip Macadamia Nut Cookie 

They have a bit of a tropical taste and notes of vanilla, salted caramel, and burnt sugar. 

4# Peanut Butter Cookies 

As you guessed it tastes like peanut butter and as a buttery creamy texture.

3# Sugar Cookies

Sugar cookies have a really soft texture and usually have a really sugary frosting 

2# Snickerdoodles 

Snickerdoodles have a cinnamon taste and are overall soft and are slightly tangy 

1# Chocolate Chip Cookies 

Chocolate chip cookies are the top cookie and the most popular. They have little chocolate chips in it which give it a great taste and are super soft, and personally I think they are the best warm 

Ranking Ice Cream Flavors by Evelyn Rice

Rules

Before we start we have to go over some rules.

First off, popsicles do not, I repeat do not count. They are just Flavored Ice.

Next, no frozen yogurt!

And lastly, you can make fun of me all you want, but pistachio is disgusting. Like guys, it’sIts probably in like, 304th place. 

#10 Blueberry

Guys like, come on.  We all know that blueberries and ice cream don't mix.  I mean two great things separate, but together bleh.

#9 Choc chip

Literally sooooooooo overrated.  It's just plain vanilla with chocolate chips in it.

#8 Vanilla

Vanilla is pretty good,  but like, it's soooo boring.  Plus,  most vanilla flavored ice creams don't even have a very strong vanilla flavor.

#7 Mint

Guys. It’s good but it's gotta have choc chips.  And don't get me started on toothpaste ice cream.  It has to actually be good mint though.

#6 Cookies and Cream

I think Cookies and Cream is good but it's extremely overrated.  And overall, just pretty boring.  I mean like, if I had to choose between vanilla and cookies and cream, then I would choose cookies and cream,  but it's definitely not my first choice.

#5 Strawberry

Okay, strawberry gets a solid 5.  it's good  and it's almost on the podium. Strawberries actually belongs in  ice cream, unlike blueberries 

#4 Chocolate

Chocolate is soooooo good plus there are like, 500 combos that include chocolate.

#3 Birthday Cake

If you get it from the right place, it can be really really good and it's a really like, creative flavor. You know ?  

#2 Peanut Butter Chocolate

Come on,  I mean,  peanut butter and chocolate, there is a match made in heaven. This is the flavor combo of the centuries.  I literally love this ice cream

#1 Cookie Dough

As a kid I absolutely loved eating the leftover cookie dough.  And when I found out that they made it into an ice cream,  I went nuts.  It was cookie dough ice cream 24/7 365.  My point is that this stuff is like eating joy. It's sooooo good. 

The Hidden Power of Positivity by Aparna Anand

Take a look at the picture above. What seems to be the problem? We can see that the bird has the choice to easily fly away through the large, open spaces in the “cage,” but it chooses to focus on the two bars that are close together (which it can’t fly through). 

This is the reality of many people, especially in middle school. We get so caught up in all of the stressful aspects of our lives that we end up being like the bird- but there are so many beautiful and positive things that are greater than that negative speck in our day. At some point, we’ve all been the bird in the cage, and that’s okay. It’s normal to feel like all the negative problems in our life are like a cage around us that bind us to negativity.

In fact, some negative things that can bind us to our cages can be friends acting strange, a poor grade on a test, or a bad day at school. However, in order to fly out of our cages, we can take a different approach. Instead of focusing on the negative parts of our day, we can give ourselves energy to fly out of the cage. 

For example, instead of berating ourselves over a bad grade on a test, we can change our thinking. (e.g “I got a poor grade on a test, but that’s okay. Next time, I will try harder and change my strategy and technique when I’m tackling a test in a tough subject.) It can also help to remind ourselves of what we’ve achieved so far- that can act as a boost for our wings to fly.

Also, daily affirmations can help with internally boosting our confidence, helping us fly out of our negativity cages. By yourself, stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself some positive things about yourself. (e.g “I had a bad day today, but a small negative speck can’t ruin all the beautiful things going on in life.”) Affirmations take time to take effect, just how it takes time to build confidence to fly out of our negativity cages. However, over time, the effects of reminding yourself of the positive parts of your life will become clear. 

Next time you have a bad day, think of the bird in the cage. It has the choice to fly out of the cage, but it chooses to stay just because of the part of the cage it can’t fly through. You have the choice to fly out of your own negativity cage, just like the bird. 

Fun Things To Do During Winter 2024 by Anthony Poust

Winter is coming very soon, and as the seasons change, so will the activities. So, I decided to share  some of those things that I enjoy doing. Let’s hop right into it, shall we?

Outdoor Snow Activities 

I love the first snowfall. It’s just so exciting. Some fun things to do outside after a fresh snowstorm can include building a snowman, sledding, having a snowball fight with friends, and spelling/drawing things by walking in the fresh snow and then looking at it from above.

Indoor Snow Activities 

While it’s snowing, it's just so fun to move whatever you’re doing and sit by a window as it snows. It looks very nice and gives a nice feel. 

Winter Break 

Winter Break gives you an amazing halfway-through-the-year checkpoint, perfect for starting some things on your list, such as reading a new book or starting a new video game. I've been playing Super Paper Mario for the Wii for the past three winter breaks.

Christmas Movies 

What’s better than sitting around a fireplace and watching a Christmas movie with your family or friends? Some of my personal favorites are the Home Alone movies, and Elf.

Big Gift Exchange 

I am one of 15 cousins, and for a lot of years, we would have a big gift exchange. We would get someone else’s name out of a hat, and then find and wrap something for them. It was always fun to see what everyone got for each other. 

Christmas Music 

Every year my family and I make a shared Christmas music playlist to listen to while we do stuff. I love music. I love Christmas. This is such a fun thing to do, especially when I find new music I’ve never heard before.

At the time of writing this, there are 65 more days until Christmas. 

Yes, it is still October. 

Yes, I am very very excited for December. 

Have a wonderful day! 

High Hopes For TSA by Tara Gopalan

The TSA competitive season has officially started, and we have some high hopes for this year. A fresh wave of students have joined the organization, and hard work has already commenced. Kids are going up to 6 events and beyond, guaranteeing some great competition! In this article, we’ll dive deeper into some new rules being introduced and what that means for our chapter. Let’s dive in!

Last year, a new event called “Vlogging” was added to the roster, and it had a huge impact. The new generation of 7th graders have pounced on the opportunity to participate, nearly filling all of our spots. After our school placed top 3 in Vlogging at the national level last year, our chapter is determined to do even better this year. It’s one of the more time-consuming event options, ensuring that we’ll have a lot on our plate!

Another change was made to our regional competition, allowing students to get feedback on their events for the first time. This has drastically improved our state and national winnings as an organization. As of October 2024, we had 70+ members throughout the grades wanting to participate. Normally, the number decreases greatly after the regional competition. However, receiving feedback from the judges allowed 11 students to pass on to states last year! Seeing the hard work already being put into events, we can expect that number to increase. 

Our school has achieved great things, one of which is a place in the national officer team. Margo Wyckoff, a former PFMS student, has been elected as the national reporter! She has already excelled at her job, spreading the word about TSA more effectively than before. A former PFMS student also holds a place on the State officer team: Harper House. She holds the position of state Secretary, and was elected in the 2024 State conference. With her and Margo in charge of their respective duties, this year is sure to be amazing. 

To conclude, our chapter will work hard to achieve our goals, learn lessons, and have fun. We are resilient  and will use the new changes to make this competition season one of our best ones yet. Thanks for reading, and make sure to support your friends in TSA! You never know what they can go on to achieve. 

Santa Conspiracies! by Tara Gopalan

This article isn't meant to convince anyone that Santa is or isn't real: It’s just meant as entertainment for people who want something to read that’s not serious or brain cell-consuming. I know Christmas is far away, but here are some early theories I have about the man in the red suit:

1. You know the line, “He sees you when you’re sleeping and knows when you’re awake”? They worded it like that for a reason. You see, Santa is a creature of the night and is therefore nocturnal, so he watches (or sees) you when you sleep. But when daylight comes along, his beady little eyes can’t adjust to the light, so he stops being able to see you. Your absence lets him know that you’re awake! That’s why he sees you when you're sleeping and doesn't see you when you're awake.
   

2. Santa has his work cut out for him: He has to eat 8 billion plates of cookies and 8 billion glasses of milk during the night before Christmas. Even if we say that he was really hungry, there has to be a better explanation: Santa is what scientists call a black hole. You heard me! He sucks up everything around him, “noodlifies” it, and then spits out presents as a white hole. Scientists have never actually been to a black hole…. But maybe the black hole comes to them. Just saying. If you don’t give him cookies, then he raids your kitchen.
   

3. We all know that Santa has a whole workshop of elves to make presents for him so he can spit them out on Christmas eve. But how are there so many elves? In tales of old, elves aren’t many in number. They’re secretive and don’t work for anyone other than themselves, kinda like goblins. So how are there so many in Santa’s workshop? Well, we can ask Gulliver’s Travels. Remember the Lilliputians who tied him up? They swarm in the hundreds. My theory is that after Gulliver left, Santa colonized the Lilliputian land and made them work as his servants. He told them he’d give them endless supplies of cookies and milk… You get where I’m going? Black holes. The elves we all love are actually trapped, underpaid Lilliputians!

4. Okay, Santa's house is huge. Like GINORMOUS. How did an old black hole of a colonizer get enough money to buy that land from the animals in the north pole, hmm? Guess what! The rising crime rates around the world are because of him. Santa is an expert at sneaking into places like houses undetected, so why couldn’t he do that to a bank? Bank cameras can’t detect black holes. Just go, take the money, blame it on rising crime rates! Genius. I mean, unethical, but still.

5. Finally, we’ve come to big old Rudolph with his party clown nose. A genetic modification, perhaps? Or, a romcom drama scene with Rudolph's parents’ tragic backstories?  The latter, of course! It makes things more interesting. One dreary day, Rudolph’s parents got the news that their child had a special mark, and they were devastated. It’s common knowledge that anything red in the world is Santa’s property, so Santa busted through the hospital roof and stole Rudolph as his parents wept. Tragic, right? Then we get a whole story about Rudolph's trials and struggles against Santa's love of capitalism, and the messed up system that he had been roped into and genetically modified to be exploited for fame! And through it all… Rudolph struggles with his emotions for a Lilliputian. AMAZING, RIGHT?!! This had to have happened. 
   

To conclude, these aren’t even half of the ideas I have regarding Santa Claus. (Please keep in mind that this is for entertainment purposes only). I hope you enjoyed these theories! Also, make sure to install a home security system on December 24th and hide your children… The black hole is coming. Merry two-months-before-Christmas!!

Reconsidering Recess by Aparna Anand

In Elementary School, a lot of us had the privilege of having a basic, twenty-minute break in addition to our lunches. However, once we got to middle school, that privilege was taken away. Why? 

The Break Benefits

According to the CDC Healthy Schools branch, recess and breaks are extremely beneficial to growing kids and can boost their mental productivity. It “increases physical activity, improving memory, attention, and concentration” (cdc.gov).    Cognition and creativity levels are boosted when students are provided with a break from the “standard structure of the classroom”  (cdc.gov). 

The benefits of recess are also proven to have a significant impact on the well being of kids. The American School of Education states that frequent recess breaks can “improve social development” and that “Recess is one of the few times of day when students get to interact with their peers under less rigorous teacher supervision”  (american.edu). These benefits are especially critical to the cognitive development of children. They can teach kids critical skills that they can keep for life such as problem solving skills, dispute management skills, and a sense of freedom from the tedious duties of the classroom. 

Additionally, Chromebooks are now a widely used resource for all students not just in Park Forest, but in the whole SCASD area. The more our eyes are exposed to blue light (radiating off of screens), the more damaged our eyes may become, and this can potentially lead to certain eye diseases such as far/nearsightedness and cornea damage. A brain break would allow us to not only stimulate our bodies, but our eyes too, and give us a break from staring at screens all day.

What Administrators Argue:

Recess can also get in the way of academics. The idea is that when kids grow older and transition into adulthood, they have to accept responsibilities and learn to work with a minimal amount of breaks; after all, adulthood isn’t about having fun and playing with friends. According to the Hechinger Report, “Recess can be stressful for some kids, especially for those who are shy, anxious or targeted by bullying.” 

Additionally, planning out a designated structure for recess would be tough on administrators- the whole idea of recess is gone without a structured approach. 

Students would just go on their chromebooks and spend the whole recess playing video games against friends or doing assignments- the complete opposite of what recess should be. Additionally, administrators argue that cutting down recess/taking away recess would help students learn more information and help them learn more (which can boost their test scores and their knowledge). *This was sparked from the passing of the No Child Left Behind Act- which began the decline of recess in schools all over the country”  (ECU Registrar). 

Park Forest Possibilities:

The classroom lifestyle is a sedentary one - there isn’t much movement involved. Here at Park Forest Middle, our block classes are a full 80 minutes of just sitting in class. An official recess period (or a small break in between classes) would be extremely beneficial as a time where we could simply have a “brain break” from the stress of classes (especially for the upper grade levels).

A budget from the district could be set aside to pay for more equipment to be used for students. Usually, there isn’t a lot of good quality equipment for students to use, if we are even allowed to go outside during class. A lot of the kickballs in the wooden baskets are deflated, and kids frequently fight over using the kickballs/volleyballs to play. A specific budget set aside for recess would allow us to get more (hopefully) better quality equipment, so everyone would be able to play. A twenty minute break in one of our morning classes would be ideal (somewhere in between periods that work for each grade). 

The Time For Change:

As we keep growing, it’s important to keep going but also to make time for breaks and having fun. Even a small recess would be beneficial to students as time to pause or take a break so we could jump back into learning with renewed clarity, energy, and purpose. 

Works Cited

Mader, Jackie. “Is recess a right or a privilege?” The Hechinger Report, 7 May 2022, https://hechingerreport.org/is-recess-a-right-or-a-privilege/. Accessed 16 September 2024.

“No Child Left Behind - ED.gov.” Department of Education, https://www2.ed.gov/nclb/landing.jhtml. Accessed 16 September 2024.

“Recess in Schools: Disposable or Essential?” ECU Registrar, https://registrar.ecu.edu/wp-content/pv-uploads/sites/242/2017/06/2010-Keats-Sparrow-Award-Winner-%E2%80%8B-3rd.-Recess-in-Schools-Disposable-or-Essential.pdf. Accessed 16 September 2024.

“Recess | Physical Activity | Healthy Schools.” CDC, https://www.cdc.gov/healthyschools/physicalactivity/recess.htm. Accessed 16 September 2024.

Top Ten Candy for Halloween by Aidan Murphy

Top 10 Candy for Halloween

10. Milky way

It’s good but really just a snickers with the nuts stripped away.

9.Twix

This used to be one of my favorites, but I’ve recently found myself preferring other options.

8. Crunch

It’s a classic but really nothing all that special. Just some chocolate and crisped rice.

7. 100 Grand

It’s not often you get these, but they are really underrated. The caramel is great.

6. Hershey’s Bar

I used to find these lame, but in recent years I’ve become more fond of them.

5. Peanut Butter M&M’s

Another underrated pick. While overshadowed by their solid peanut brother, they work well.

4. Peanut M&M’s

The hardness of the nut really compliments the crispy chocolate shell.

3. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup

While these are delicious, you go through them way too fast.

2. KitKat

While slightly overrated, you can’t deny how good they are. Both the chocolate and wafer are great.

1. Snickers

The best candy ever, and I’ll die on that hill. Milky Way and Three Musketeers wish they could be like the Snickers bar. The nuts, chocolate, caramel, nougat…everything comes together to create pure bliss. 

Liberation by Samuel Rockmore

The day is upon us.

Liberation is near.

I’m just gonna rank things to do this summer.

Going outside

I hate being hot, and summer is way too hot.

The heat in summer is agonizingly hot, and anyone sharper than a marble knows that going outside in the summer is a mistake. If you don’t wanna drown in your own sweat, don’t go outside.

Sleeping 

Sleeping is nice, but a sheer waste of time. You don’t have much time.

The Pool
Going to the pool is nice. It’s fun, and can help cool you down. Plus, it’s fun to splash at innocent bystanders. It’s hilarious. 

Playing video games
This is valid. It’s just an objectively fun way to spend your time, as long as you’re playing a good game. Fortnite players can go cry themselves to sleep.

Duolingo

An actually productive way to spend your time. Duolingo is objectively great, I have a 1090 day streak.

Drinking varieties of milk

MILK.

Milkshakes, ice cream, carbonated milk, chocolate milk, all of it is good.

Milk is just objectively good.

Also carbonated milk is a soda.

That’s it.

Forever.

Bye.

Matthew Rockmore, Penn State University

"Teensessions" by Tara Gopalan

I don’t know if it’s just a nerd thing, but throughout the years (including now), I’ve gone through some intense obsessions. While having an obsession, there’s the strong urge to tell everyone you know about it in the most annoying way possible, so I'm calling these teenage obsessions “teensessions”. Mine were mostly about books (like the nerd I am), so that’s what this article will be focusing on. Despite how short teensessions are, they bring us happiness, so let’s shine some light on teensessions and list some really popular ones!

Harry Potter. Everyone has heard of it, and if you haven’t…well, you’ve got a lot to learn. Most book nerds have gone through their Harry Potter phase: reading fan stories, looking at every fanart in existence, reading Prisoner of Azkaban a billion times, etc. However, some people are more than obsessed, more than immersed. These are the people who literally think that they are in the Harry Potter world. That’s how you get 13-year-olds who walk around and call themselves “The boy who lived” and turn up their noses at “muggles.” If you’ve gone through that phase, try looking around to see if you can find all the stray wooden dowels you used to call wands. 

The Hunger Games. I have not read them, but MAN are people obsessed with them! I know people who have tried to recreate Katniss’s “Girl On Fire” dress using a bathrobe and streamers. As you can tell, this obsession is serious. Somehow, children fighting each other for survival really peaks the interest of a lot of teenagers. I don’t know about you, but I thought for the longest time that Peeta’s name was spelled like pita bread, so you can imagine that I was discouraged from reading the books after I found out. It’s that kind of book series where you either love it or have ABSOLUTELY no interest, and although I’m the latter, I won’t judge enthusiasts… much. 

Lord of The Rings! This is peak literature. I’m biased, but who doesn’t know Gandalf’s famous line, “You shall not pass”? Surprisingly, this series is ranked below Twilight for most peoples’ likings, but it still has a significant number of enthusiasts. These are the kind of books that you get addicted to, but it’s worthwhile because “[a]ll we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” Thankfully, there isn't a formula for writing the books, so the most people can do is have a fully Lord-of-The-Rings themed birthday party with a Legolas ice cream cake that’s slowly melting into a puddle. No, I’m not speaking from experience…It’s a reference, I’m nerdy, deal with it. 

Those are the three most-well-known book series that people have teensessions about! Of course we can’t forget series like Twilight and the whole Percy Jackson universe, but those have to be fit into a future article. Teensessions are short, they make us happy, and no matter how weird your teensession is, We’ll all be fully awake while sitting through your long, nerdy rants. Probably. 

Pencil Rankings by Edward Chote

Today I will be ranking pencils because they are very essential school materials and I feel that you deserve to know what will be the best option on these precious items. 

5. The cheap mechanical pencils: These are normally a good option but the graphite at the tip always breaks and ends up not being able to last as long as most would like. 

4. The modern metal mechanical pencils: These may be better than the cheap ones because they don't break in half as easily when you try bending them. But like the cheap ones the graphite is always breaking in half when you need it the most.

3. The normal number 2 pencil: These are always a good option because the graphite won't break as easily but whenever you get one from your friend there’s always a thousand bitemarks in it.

2. The giant number 2 pencils: Whenever you show up to class with one of these you instantly become popular, but they can be a bit of a hassle to carry around.

1. The normal number 1 pencil: These are obviously the best pencils, they have softer graphite allowing you to write smother. Making it less likely to tear through the paper when you're writing an angry letter. Not to mention they are literally the number one pencil.

Drama Club Presents "Legally Blond" by Hiromi Fong and Rachel Turner

Drama club is the Sigma Alpha Male of art, filled with dancing, singing and acting. 

The current show in Park Forest Middle School is  Legally Blonde jr., is based on an award-winning Broadway musical and a hit motion picture. Legally Blonde the Musical Jr. is a journey through self-empowerment. The show has a lot of recognizable songs filled with humor and sass. 

Elle Woods is the main character throughout the musical; she goes to tackle her dreams until Warner dumps her and claims she's not serious and leaves for Harvard. Elle decides to try to get him back and uses a crafty show dance for her personal essay, using her charm to get her way into law school.  This leads to her befriending classmate Emmett, hair stylist Paulette, and Vivane on her way to finding love. And soon she realizes that law might be the thing she never knew she was missing.

Come see the show at the PFMS Auditorium April 19, 20, & 21.   Tickets are $10 and can be purchased online or at the door.   We hope to see you at the show!  

Work Cited

Martin, Jennifer. “Legally Blonde The Musical JR.” Music Theatre International, 13 September 2012, https://www.mtishows.com/legally-blonde-the-musical-jr. Accessed 12 April 2024.

Image Source: Unsplash